If you are fortunate enough to have never been to Illinois, then you remain blissfully unaware of what a festering cesspool of asinine, omnipresent toll booths it is. Every few miles on any major road in Illinois, there is a toll station that requires some eldritch sum that you're guaranteed to not have on you in order to pass. Only a wretched communist would devise such an insipid scheme. I imagine the following conversation taking place:
Illinois Stalin: "Hey, Comrade, how about instead of setting up toll booths at the highway exits that charge people based on how far they drove like those capitalist dogs in New York do, we put random toll booths along the highway that stop traffic and have strange payment amounts that no one ever has on them?"
Illinois Lenin: "I love you, Comrade Stalin! Let us make sweet Communist love on the shag rug by the fireplace!"
Obviously, Illinois is COMMUNISM!
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